February 21, 2013, (LifeSiteNews.com) – Dear pro-lifer: My friend asked if it is okay to use contraception. A girl responded by saying ‘no’ because it's the same as killing, the same as abortion. A guy came in the conversation saying that we could use it because there's nothing living in there yet.

My question is this: Is there any way to prove that contraception is wrong? I know it's wrong, but I also want to be able to prove it.

Let's begin by making a few things clear. Contraception artificially blocks the life-creating potential of the sexual act between a man and woman. There are many ways contraception can do this. A condom blocks fertility by keeping the man's sperm from entering the woman's body. The pill chemically blocks fertility by keeping the woman's body from ovulating. There are many forms of chemicals (spermicides, implants such as the IUD) that either kill sperm or impede a woman's natural fertility cycle. There is also vasectomy that unnaturally blocks tubes that are designed to carry sperm out of a man’s body.

Contraceptive drugs are unhealthy to the human body and are known to cause such problems as weight gain, heart attacks, cancer, and even death. It’s only common sense that taking a drug to suppress a naturally occurring healthy function of a woman’s body, namely her fertility, can only mess up her health. Vasectomy also has its problems, with many men experiencing increased sensitivity and even chronic pain in their testicles after the procedure. Some find their sexual drive dwindles after the procedure.

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There is also the Plan B morning-after pill, which, when taken by the woman after having sex from which a new life has been created, can cause the death of that life. The makers of the drug admit that Plan B “may inhibit implantation by altering the endometrium [i.e., the lining of the womb].” In other words, Plan B may cause a newly conceived embryo to die and be expelled because it cannot implant itself in the lining of the woman’s womb.

It is easy to see why taking Plan B is wrong. The purpose of the drug is to kill the fragile, new life that has just been created. Killing the innocent is always a crime. 

It is more complex to explain why any form of contracepted sex is wrong.

Sex is a deeply personal act where you give yourself — your entire heart, soul, and body — to another person. Even the removal of clothing indicates an unreserved giving of self. Cleaving to one another in deep love and affection, it's as if the lovers are saying with their bodies: "I am yours and you are mine". Their actions and reactions proclaim, "I give you all my heart, soul, and body for you to treasure, and I take as treasure your entire heart, soul, and body."

When contraception is brought into the picture, suddenly a wrench is thrown into the self-giving meaning of the act. Now, the lover gives “almost” everything to his/her beloved, except his/her fertility. Sexual love now turns into a conditional love. And a wrench is thrown into the very purpose of the act, which is to unite the lovers and create new life. 

Hence with contraception, the sexual act suddenly loses its deeply personal meaning of total self-giving and its natural purpose of creating new life. 

With this loss of meaning and purpose, many contracepting couples have eventually discovered that contraception feeds a creeping selfishness that makes the man and woman focus almost exclusively on their own pleasure in sex, and not on one another. Contraception makes one person suddenly become for the other a sexual object to be used for pleasure and no longer a cherished and honored beloved. 

The resulting mutual sexual exploitation can devastate true love. 

By putting fertility under lock and key and thereby closing the sexual act to the possibility of new life, the contracepting couple no longer is able to give themselves completely and totally to each other. It is true that with contraception, the lovers caught up in the sexual act still act and react in much the same fashion as without, but the inner life of the person suffers rejection and compromise. Contraception degrades and violates the person.

This is why contraception turns sex into a big fat lie. It makes the lover say, "I love you, but not your fertility. I don't want that part of you. Lock it up." It truly poisons love between a husband and wife since nobody ever wants to be loved only conditionally. 

A holy prophet once wrote 45 years ago that a man practicing contraception would "finally lose respect for the woman, and no longer caring for her physical and psychological equilibrium, may come to the point of considering her as a mere instrument of selfish enjoyment, and no longer as his respected and beloved companion."

With rampant use of pornography, the explosion of the hook-up culture, and sex-sex-sex without commitment or responsibility screamed from every corner of the media and entertainment world, it is easy to see that this prediction has sadly come to pass. 

So you see, using contraception is morally wrong since it destroys the meaning and purpose of the sexual act. Plan B is doubly wrong since it potentially adds murder to the above by seeking to destroy a newly created human life. 

If you are Catholic, using contraception is a mortal sin that cuts off your life of grace with God (with the conditions of knowing that it’s gravely wrong and deciding to do it anyway). The Church teaches that "each and every marriage act must remain open to the transmission of life." If you die unrepentant in the sin of contraception, you risk losing heaven forever. If you are contracepting and want to regain the state of grace, you must confess your sin to a priest and cease using contraception.

The Church stands firm in this teaching because she loves her own dearly and wants a husband and wife to have the best conjugal life possible. 

You see, fertility is a most beautiful and precious part of a person. It must be treasured, valued, and treated with the utmost respect and responsibility.

If you need to postpone pregnancy, there’s Natural Family Planning (NFP) whereby a couple foregoes sexual acts during the fertile time. When done properly, it is just as if not more effective than any form of contraception, totally safe (no drugs or chemicals polluting the body), and completely in line with God's plan for marriage. 

Sincerely,

Your pro-life friend Pete Baklinski from LifeSiteNews.com

LifeSiteNews journalist Pete Baklinski has a B.A. in liberal arts and a masters in theology (STM). He is married to Erin and together they have five children.