March 26, 2012 ( - Much attention in a 40 Days for Life campaign is on the mother and her unborn child — and saving the life of the baby scheduled to be aborted. But each of those children has a father — someone who is legally in no man’s land. He has no rights — and often no influence.

Steve, the 40 Days for Life coordinator in Glendale, California, tells the story of one such man — a guy he refers to as “Bill.”


“Our ‘Women DO Regret Abortion’ and ‘Men Regret Lost Fatherhood’ signs were out as we prayed for all those affected by abortion,” Steve said, as Bill — a man in his early 40s — walked by, pushing a young girl in a stroller.

“What you do here — does it work?” he asked. “Yes,” Steve responded. “We pray for the women, the babies and the abortion workers and sometimes they change their minds.”

“My wife, she had an abortion here last Friday,” Bill said.

Steve was a bit stunned. “I am so sorry for your loss,” he said. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Bill said. “I just don’t understand. Why did she do it?”

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His wife was having problems with morning sickness, but Bill kept telling her in a couple more weeks it would be okay. “Now, my wife is sad and says that she regrets that she did it.”

Steve and another man encouraged Bill to seek post-abortive counseling for him, his wife and perhaps marriage counseling together.

“We provided him contact information to several local organizations that would help him start the healing process and to deal with all the emotions he now had and that he would have as the shock wore off and the realization set in that he and his entire family would have to deal with something that has forever changed his family.”

“Could God forgive us of this?” Bill asked tentatively.

“Yes, he can!” Steve answered. “There is no sin God cannot forgive.”

In reflecting on this conversation, Steve said, “I am routinely amazed by how God uses the 40 Days for Life ministry as a means for healing to all those affected by the horror of abortion.”

Still, he said, “I can only imagine that path that Bill will travel now; asking for an answer to ‘Why did she do it?’ when there is no answer. How does he deal with his wife’s actions, coupled with her regret, while processing his own grief and loss?

“How does he deal with the fact that his wife’s family was counseling her to get the abortion against her husband’s wishes? How does he someday tell his beautiful daughter that she was going to have a little brother or sister, but her mommy decided to get an abortion and by law, he couldn’t stop her?”

Steve knows there are no human answers. “I do know where Bill can find the answers,” he said, “and they are in Christ Jesus, the great redeemer and healer of our souls. He is the only one that can help Bill forgive himself, his wife, his family and cause healing to occur.”

Steve said he is “left with the resolve that there is so much more work to be done to end the horror of abortion. To you, my brothers and sisters in Christ, I call on you to join me as an active participant on the front lines … we need you!”

There is still time for action. Find a 40 Days for Life location near you … and get involved!