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Justin TrudeauPhoto by Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images for Canadian American Business Council

Stop Trudeau’s Reckless Climate Plans That Could Spark Food Shortages! Contact your Canadian MP & Senators NOW.

(LifeSiteNews) – The phrase “stranger than fiction” may perhaps best describe life under the Trudeau regime. Day after day we are given reasons to either laugh, or cry, or laugh so hard that we cry.

Canada is still lagging behind the developed nations of the world in dropping the COVID charade but instead of moving along and getting with the times, Trudeau and his cronies have decided that the real enemy is plastic forks.

The nation is vaxxed to the max and all the jab lovers are coming down with the rona, so now it is time to direct our collective focus away from the invisible threat of the Wuhan-Flu to the very real and visible encroachment of eating utensils.

Have no fear, citizen, the failed drama teacher has identified the truly existential threat of single-use plastics, and he has a plan to save the world, one set of reusable cutleries at a time.

The plan from Trudeau’s Liberals outlines a variety of products that have been labeled as “toxic.” Yes that’s right, the same people who told you to wear and throw away non-biodegradable masks multiple times a day for two years, is now asking you to trust their judgement on how bad it is to use stuff and throw it away.

Not only that, but these same planet-saving sages will be putting the burden of resorting to Amish-style food delivery techniques on the restaurants that the jet-setting booster-lovers made sure were largely made bankrupt for two and half years.

In order to ensure that the COVID brownshirts aren’t out of work, the new regulations would include “site visits” to ensure compliance, and enforcement mechanisms could include “prosecutions”… You know, jail time, for making plastic stuff.

It is hard to imagine a group of people who are simultaneously as absurd and as out of touch with basic reality as the members of Canada’s Liberal Party.

The Big Six

You have heard of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: well, the demi-urges in Ottawa have identified the Big Six of environmental terrorism.

Checkout bags, cutlery, food service-ware made of plastic, ring carriers, straws and stir sticks round out the list of the Big Six threats to the Canadian ecosystem.

According to the plan, it will become illegal to import these items by the end of the year, but don’t fret, the compassionate black-face enthusiast has made it clear that businesses will have a whole year to figure out a way to change the entire way they serve food, while also figuring out a way to find a tonne of money to ensure they don’t get shut down for not being green enough.

Phew, what a relief!

Trudeau’s environmental Joseph Goebbels – MP Steven Guilbeault – said that the government is helping businesses offer “the sustainable solutions Canadians want.”

Funny, I don’t remember being asked if I wanted to use straws that disintegrate in my mouth, or harbouring some unexpressed desire to bring my own lunch-bag to a food truck.

Eat with your hands!

Ever the progressives and agents of human flourishing, the libs are recommending that we eat like chimpanzees.

You may be used to using forks for your poutine and dumplings, but God gave you fingers so you should use them!

Guilbeault’s environmental department sent out a list of recommendations for businesses to figure out how to adapt to a new policy of coercion and humiliation. Among other things, the department said that Canadians could simply “eat with their hands” to “comply with the federal ban” on single use plastic forks.

Is there anything more quintessentially liberal than creating a crisis and then mandating compliance to make Canadians look stupid?

The guide on how to eat with your hands also uttered the highly sophisticated revelation that Canadians “do not require a straw to consume a beverage while seated at a table.”

I must say, it is a comfort to know that there are people who make hundreds of thousands of dollars to work hard dozens of days a year and are smart enough to officially tell Canadians that they can drink out of cups with their mouths. We are truly blessed.

The government also made it clear that “some companies have designed lids” that allow people to drink without straws. It isn’t clear if the government believes that the coffee-cup lids that people have been using for decades are in fact a new invention.

Trudeau in court again

Not only does Trudeau love to use the courts to crush Canadian freedoms, but he seems to love being called to them as well.

Several major plastic manufacturers are taking the government to court. As you can imagine, by banning plastic utensils, they will also be banning a lot of people from working and making money. Now, we shouldn’t be surprised at this, as putting the nation on welfare might be Trudeau’s favourite pass-time.

A group of plastic manufacturers have filed a suit against the anti-plastic crusaders over the government’s listing of plastic of toxic under the Canadian Environmental Protection Act.

I wonder how much plastic was used to package the vaccines… Oh wait, those were safe and effective, I forgot.

Science is in the eye of the beholder

It would be one thing if the science was on the side of the government, but that is about as likely as pigs flying.

But, it looks like the science behind the climate friendly policies of filling landfills with cardboard straws is about as solid as the science behind wearing beanies on your face and standing far away from someone for public health.

In 2011, a research paper put out by the Northern Ireland Assembly, showed that significantly more energy is needed to make paper bags than plastic bags.

According to the research: “30,000 cotton bags can be packed into a 20-foot container, but the same container will accommodate 2.5 million plastic carrier-bags.”

This would mean that “80x more ships would be required” to meet the transportation demands of alternative grocery or takeaway bags.

That means 80x the fuel and emissions to ensure that Canadians are nicer to mother earth.

Yes, it is likely that the government has, or will produce, their own “scientific” research that will prove the opposite of what the Irish study showed. But, that is the nature of today’s science.

Whether it is science that shows masks are ineffective for viruses one month, only to change the conclusion the next, or studies that show that burning more fuel is better to reduce pollution, we can trust that Trudeau’s science experts will give us very scientific research that has been approved by the government.

Stop Trudeau’s Reckless Climate Plans That Could Spark Food Shortages! Contact your Canadian MP & Senators NOW.

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Kennedy Hall is an Ontario based journalist for LifeSiteNews. He is married with children and has a deep love for literature and political philosophy. He is the author of Terror of Demons: Reclaiming Traditional Catholic Masculinity, a non-fiction released by TAN books, and Lockdown with the Devil, a fiction released by Our Lady of Victory Press. He writes frequently for Crisis Magazine, Catholic Family News, and is on the editorial board at OnePeterFive.