By Rev. Thomas J. Euteneuer

FRONT ROYAL, Virginia, August 6, 2009 ( – I have a modest proposal for getting rid of wasteful spending, irresponsible government and even out-of-sight deficits: let's demand cash for trading in congressional clunkers.

The idea occurred to me when I recently found out that our esteemed House of Representatives just authorized $200 million for three new luxury jets to take them on the “necessary” trips that they have to go on in order to do the business of government that we have not asked them to do. Since “we the people” are their bosses, we technically “own” their services, and therefore, if we just told them that their services were no longer needed and traded them in for cash, we may finally be able to get some value out of them or get new ones that actually function properly.

It works for deadbeat and inefficient cars, why not for congressmen – and congresswomen of course?

Clunkers are defined as old vehicles that do not meet minimum standards of fuel efficiency or road performance. In other words, they spew too much exhaust and give their owners a shaky sense of security. Well, this certainly defines the vast majority of congress-persons that govern us in Washington, right? – not to mention many in our state legislatures, too, I would imagine.

We have to admit that exhaust just bellows out of Washington, DC these days. In fact, most days it seems like nothing but hot air is generated in the hallowed halls of Congress. I can't recall the last time I applauded a congressional decision or even felt remotely satisfied with congressional performance!

Less hot and dirty air from our nation's center would do us all a lot of good. If we could remove the sources of pollution – our congressmen – then we could also eliminate the thousand-page documents they incessantly generate and call legislation, as well as all second-hand pollution and retardants known as bureaucrats, special interest groups and the rest of the congressional pencil-pushers hanging around in Washington.

Our elected officials do not give us a strong sense of security on the road either. Why should “we the people” be confident about our congress-persons who have voted to enslave several generations of future Americans with a national debt that dwarfs the cumulative total of all government spending in its entire history?

Silly me, but I thought our representatives were supposed to serve the common good of the people of this nation. Here they have sold more than a trillion dollars of our national debt to China, taken over large corporations like they were playing a large game of Monopoly® and are presently taxing the middle class out of existence.

Now they want to nationalize our private health care decisions, make us pay for other people's abortions and pretend that they really care about the 80 million baby boomers who will soon be marched into the “end-of-life” re-education camps to complete their “duty” to the country. The nation's confidence in our elected leaders is at an all-time low. Tell me again why we need them?

We now have a summer recess in which our congressional clunkers are supposed to consult with their constituents in their districts and states. Here's a thought: instead of tea parties, rallies or town hall meetings this summer let's demand hard cash for these clunkers and begin the monumental task of eradicating our national debt, restoring respect for human life, returning to the vision of a representative republic that our Founding Fathers gave to this great nation and placing our country, once again, “under God” where it belongs.

There, I feel better now…


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