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(LifeSiteNews) — In his first interview since his ex-wife’s trial for the murder of their three young children ended in a mistrial earlier this month, Patrick Clancy described how his infant son Callan died in his arms in hospital four days after the gruesome January 2023 attack.

Speaking to CBS 60 Minutes correspondent Ross Douthat, Patrick said that when he returned home, he discovered his three children strangled in the basement. Cora, age 5, and Dawson, age 3, were dead. Eight-month-old Callan was still alive and airlifted to Boston Children’s Hospital.

“I really thought there was a chance that Callan would live,” said Patrick. He explained that, as he sped to the hospital, he kept thinking, “‘Just gimme one. Just gimme one kid,’ and I would raise him as best I could, and I would give him the best life I possibly could. I’d tell him about his brother and sister. And I was holding out hope for that. And then when I got to the hospital, I saw the doctor. I saw the look on her face, and I knew that it wasn’t going to be a good prognosis.”

The father said he was grateful for the four days he had with his infant son. 

With tears welling up in his eyes, he recounted saying to Callan, “I’m so sorry.”

“I got to hold him. I got to lay down next to him, and he died in my arms,” said Patrick, choking back tears. 

During his time in the hospital, Patrick held Callan’s hand as he wrote tributes to each of his children so that they would not be forgotten.  

Patrick said that during those early days he chose to forgive Lindsay. He disagreed with the headlines calling her a “Killer Mom,” “Baby Murderer,” and a “Monster.” “None of them were accurate,” said Patrick. “I believe that it was her mental illness.”

He said he realized that it was important to forgive Lindsay, because, “If I didn’t get there, I would be eaten up inside. Forever.”

Patrick also explained that Lindsay has never asked him for forgiveness, “But I gave it to her.”

Three months after the murder of his children, Patrick packed up and left the small seaside town where he and Lindsay had raised their kids, and moved to New York City where he hoped to live in anonymity. 

“Five weeks after I moved to New York, on May 26, I had to figure out how I’m going to celebrate Callan’s first birthday,” he recounted. 

“How do you celebrate your son’s first birthday, months after he’s passed away?” he wondered.

“So I go to St. Patrick’s Cathedral, I light a candle, I say, ‘I love you buddy,’ and I walk out on Fifth Avenue and I start crying my eyes out.”

Douthat said that while Lindsay was on trial in a Massachusetts courtroom, Patrick was undergoing “trial by TikTok,” as online influencers dissected the case, portraying Patrick as “uncaring, unfaithful, and even the murderer of his children.”

Patrick said that their unfounded speculation that he is somehow to blame has been “deeply harmful to the legacy of my children. It’s a huge distraction from what really matters here, which is perinatal mental health.”

“It’s done real harm to real people, myself included,” he added. “It’s painful to see, and it makes it difficult to be in public.”

On the day that Patrick’s 911 call recording was going to be played in the courtroom, Patrick said he knew it was going to be “horrific.” 

“My heart was pounding,” he said, as he underwent a massive, traumatic panic attack while waiting in a court anteroom. He turned down medication because he was determined to return to the courtroom to finish his testimony.

In the months following that horrible day in January 2023, he consulted with experts and support groups in order to understand what led to Lindsay’s unspeakable actions.

Patrick, who has since remarried, now lives in New York with his new wife, Rachel Danis. Danis later joined Patrick for the Douthat interview.

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