Editor’s note: As readers may recall, late last month LifeSiteNews reported that imprisoned pro-lifer Will Goodman had been seriously injured in a fall from his prison bunk. Recently, Will wrote a reflection about the accident to his supporters, which we republish here today.
(LifeSiteNews) — Dear friends,
As most of you know, three weeks ago on Friday, November 15 at around 5am I had a mysterious fall from the top bunk of my bed here in Danbury prison.
To be honest, I remember very little of that particular day, and only bits and pieces of the week that followed.
Having been in bed for recuperation most of these past weeks, there has been much time to pray and think about this mysterious accident.
Before anything else, I just want to say that I thank God for all His goodness and grace.
Quite often, the accident replays itself in my mind. Most commonly, I envision the whole incident without wanting to.
Yet, whenever I soberly consider that I tumbled (all 165 pounds of me) directly headfirst onto the concrete floor from a height of just over 5 feet, I cannot but help recognize the protective Hand of the Lord guarding me.
I am grateful.
The fact is that I was completely asleep. In a deep sleep. I was not able to break my fall. I was not able to protect my head as it hit the ground first. Mine was a freefall that stopped very suddenly and violently.
Despite this reality, I am grateful.
Some here in the prison have asked me honest questions: “Why did God let this happen?” and “Was God punishing you?” or “Did the devil attack you in your sleep?”
I ask God these questions too.
In prayer, two verses from Scripture keep coming back to me: “Trust in the Lord God at all times” from the Psalms (e.g., Ps 131:3); and “If we accept (receive) good from the Lord, should we not also accept (receive) evil?” from the Book of Job (cf. 1:10).
Before I fell asleep that fateful evening I prayed my nightly prayer from the Liturgy of the Hours:
Protect me Lord as I stay awake;
watch over me as I sleep;
that awake I may keep watch with Christ;
and asleep rest in His peace.
I asked Almighty God to protect me from my enemies. But I still somehow launched myself out of the top bunk with severe consequences.
READ: Pro-life rescuer Will Goodman seriously injured in fall
Perhaps it is true that sometimes suffering, pain, and even trauma are not always our enemies. Maybe sometimes God permits such difficult things to happen in order to draw us closer to Him.
When I landed in a heap, I was unconscious, but I firmly believe I was resting “in His peace.”
In the midst of a broken, fallen world – Almighty God still heard my prayer and provided His protection.
During this painful ordeal as well as the psychological struggle of trying to understand what happened, I have felt closer to Christ whenever I surrender to Him with gratitude.
He seems to speak His Word to my heart: “Be still and know that I am God.”
The Lord is God, thus there are many reasons to be thankful.
Thanks be to God that I did not shatter or fuse my neck or back vertebrae, or completely sever my spine.
I am not paralyzed. I can feel and use my arms and legs, hands and feet, fingers and toes. Deo gratias.
I praise Him that I did not totally crush my skull and brain.
As far as I know, I did not suffer catastrophic brain damage. I can pray, think, see, hear, speak, eat, drink, walk, type, and converse with others. Deo gratias.
I am so grateful that I did not bleed out while lying on the floor, or asphyxiate on the internal bleeding from my nose and face.
I did not die. I lived. By God’s grace. Deo gratias.
I am thankful for my fellow inmates who helped me. Zeik the J6 farmer who heard my head hit the ground and rushed to my aid while everyone else in the dorm was asleep. And my bunkie “Big Nick” who then found me on the floor in a pool of my own blood and went for help immediately. It is quite possible these men helped to save my life. Thanks be to God!
Thank God that BOP staff first responders arrived before dawn, came to my help to stabilize me and transport me from the second floor of my unit, down the stairs and then across an outdoor courtyard, through another building, and down a walkway to the ambulance. I made it in time.
I’m likewise thankful for the EMTS, the nurses, and doctors who helped me while I was in the ambulance and in the emergency room for about 11 hours.
I thank Jesus for all of my friends and fellow inmates who have prayed for me (and are praying for me). I believe Almighty God heard each one of your prayers and answered in His Divine Mercy.
I am so grateful after visiting the surgeon specialist on Wednesday that I will not need surgury on my skull or face. Praise God!
While I still have multiple fractures in my skull, some serious lingering concussion symptoms, neck and back pain, and a few other medical issues, I thank God for His generous mercy, and for being with me through all of this, even when I have not always sensed His Presence.
Some days and nights I “felt” rather alone or abandoned and all I can seem to do is unite my life to Christ on the Cross.
And yet, during much of the time, I have sensed Him, too, through you, your charity, support, prayers, and friendship. These have been profound consolations to be sure!
I marvel at how Jesus’ love reaches us through His people!
It has also seemed to me important to thank God even for the suffering too, now having something more to offer God along with my poor prayers for the salvation of souls and an end to the [abortion] holocaust. So I thank Him for permitting the suffering and pain. If He permitted this to happen to me, there must be good here, even in the midst of the trauma. Even when I do not understand.
Faith is often practiced in the space between what is known and what is not.
I cannot say that I suffer perfectly, pray perfectly, or understand perfectly what has happened.
I do not know why ultimately I fell.
But I do know one thing: that Christ was with me in the fall and after the fall. I thank Him. This is my faith, and it is a grace.
Being stuck in bed for three weeks has also brought many blessed opportunities for prayer and uniting myself to Jesus. The forced confinement has not been easy. I miss being active, reading, exercising, and attending Bible studies. The long night hours of insomnia have been challenging at times. Still, I see these uncomfortable gifts as evidence of His grace for which to be further grateful.
This continues to be a sort of “retreat within a retreat.”
The strange accident remains a mystery in many ways. I do not pretend to have all of the answers.
But when I realize how very bad it could have been, I cannot help but be grateful.
When I recognize all of the good surrounding me since the catastrophe, I cannot stop from giving thanks.
Thank You, Jesus!
Thanks to all of you!
Through these three weeks of pilgrimage, Almighty God has revealed that He is good to us and loves us in the easy times as well as in the difficult times.
Through the night of challenge He brings the dawn of His comfort.
“Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, You are there with Your staff and crook which bring me comfort.” (Psalm 23:4)
Deo gratias.
+ Have a blessed Advent,
W.G.
READ: Abortion pill murders by men force the media to acknowledge an unborn baby dies
To send a letter (not a card) with your good wishes to Will Goodman, please write to the following address:
WILLIAM GOODMAN 93822-509
FCI Danbury
Federal Correction Institution
Route 37
Danbury, CT 06811
When writing to prisoners in federal institutions, readers are asked to remember the following general advice:
- If accepted, your letters will be opened by prison staff and the envelopes discarded. If you hope the prisoner will write back, include your mailing address in the letter itself.
- Use ink only, blue or black, whether writing by hand or typing.
- Paper should be no larger than 8.5”x 11”.
- Use standard envelopes and clearly write both the prisoner’s and sender’s addresses.
- Use white stationary.
- Do not send any cardboard item: no Mass or Christmas cards.
- Do not use crayons, markers, glitter, stickers or perfume.
- Write on one side of the page.
- Do not exceed five pages.
- Do not draw anything that could be construed as a gang symbol.
- Check the prison’s regulations regarding photographs or any exceptions to the above.